I was always “the responsible one”—the one who remembered birthdays, sorted medications, paid bills, and showed up without being asked. So when my Nana turned 80 and started slowing down, it felt natural that I’d take care of her. I handled groceries, medications, errands, even her TV remote. Not because I had to—because I loved her. Then one afternoon, everything shattered. She was waiting at the kitchen table with my notebook open. Her voice was cold.
“Quit pretending to care,” she said. “You just want my money.” She’d read a line I’d written: Call attorney about estate transfer—but not the rest: in case of emergency. She thought I was planning for her death. I left in tears. Two days later, she called back, devastated when she realized the truth. But something deeper was wrong—she’d been forgetting things. A month later, the diagnosis came: early-stage dementia.
I rearranged my life to care for her. Labels on drawers. Alarms for meals. Coloring books for calm. We laughed, planned, planted herbs, and recorded her stories. Then the bank called. Someone had tried to steal her money using her PIN. Security footage later showed it was her neighbor’s grandson—the boy she’d trusted. He’d seen her enter her PIN once and decided she “didn’t need it anymore.” That’s when we locked everything down and made it legal. Not out of fear—out of protection.
Her mind faded slowly, but her love never did. Even when she forgot my name, she never forgot how to hug me. The night she passed peacefully in her sleep, she left me a letter. Inside: gratitude, forgiveness, and everything she owned—not because she had to, but because she said I “showed up.” Three years later, I still live in her house. Her scarf hangs on a chair. Her garden still grows. And I finally understand:
Love isn’t proven by words or money.
It’s proven by staying.