Dear Wife,

I’m leaving you for good. After 7 years of marriage, I’ve had enough. These past two weeks have been unbearable. Finding out you quit your job was the last straw.

Last week, you didn’t even notice my new haircut, favorite meal I cooked, or the new silk boxers I wore. You ate quickly and then went straight to bed, avoiding any connection. You don’t show affection anymore—no love, no intimacy. I can’t handle it.

I’m done. Your sister and I are moving to West Virginia. Have a nice life.