Father: “Why did you fail your math test?”
Johnny replied, “On Monday, the teacher said 3 + 5 = 8. On Tuesday, she said 4 + 4 = 8. And on Wednesday, she said 6 + 2 = 8.”
The father frowned. “So what?”
Johnny shrugged. “If she can’t make up her mind, how am I supposed to know the right answer?”

Benjamin was serving a 30-year sentence for robbing banks when, after 12 years, he received surprising news. His uncle from Ludhiana had passed away and left him more than $50,000. Benjamin was thrilled when the warden told him the money would be placed in trust until his release. The warden asked if there was anything Benjamin wanted to buy before the money was locked away.

Benjamin said he had read a lot about computers and wanted one. The warden agreed and bought him a brand-new Compaq computer.
A few weeks later, the warden visited Benjamin’s cell and was shocked to find the computer smashed on the floor.

When asked what happened, Benjamin angrily explained that the computer didn’t work.
“It couldn’t even do one simple thing,” he said.
“What did you want it to do?” the warden asked.
Benjamin replied, “I hit the escape key again and again—and I’m still here.”