Wife receives a divorce letter from husband

Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it.

These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer.

Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.

You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.

Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving.

Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband,
Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been.

I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work.

I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment.

And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago.

About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.

After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.

Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!

Please share this story with your friends and family if you think it was funny.

Related Posts

People are just realising why Melania Trump’s inauguration outfit looks so familiar

Melania Trump’s Inauguration Day outfit, worn on January 20, sparked buzz online, particularly her bold black hat. Stepping out with Donald Trump and their son Barron at…

Fans Shocked By Barron Trump’s Stunning Appearance After

Barron Trump has drawn attention for his remarkable growth, now towering at approximately 6′ 9″. As Trump joked, “Barron is 6-foot-7, can you believe it? And he’s…

This Daring Style on Live Television? Demi Moore Showed She’s the Ultimate Statement Maker!

Demi Moore’s unforgettable appearance on The Late Show with David Letterman remains a defining moment in late-night television, symbolizing confidence and empowerment. By then, Moore was already…

Bruce Springsteen And Robert De Niro Decide To Leave The United States Due To Disrespect And Shocking Statements

Bruce Springsteen and Robert De Niro, two iconic American cultural figures, have decided to leave the U.S., citing growing disillusionment with the country’s direction and increasing disrespect…

Donald Trump’s attempt to kiss wife Melania during inauguration has people very confused

Donald Trump’s attempt to plant a kiss on wife Melania’s face upon his arrival at the Capitol Rotunda today for his inauguration was utterly thwarted by an…

NEW: Leaked Video Allegedly Shows Adam Schiff Dozing Off During Confirmation Hearing

Senator Adam Schiff (D-CA) has become the subject of heated discussion following the release of a leaked video that seemingly shows him dozing off during the high-profile…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *