“Dad, cancel my allowance immediately, rent out my room, throw all my clothes out the window, and take my TV, stereo, iPhone, iPod, and laptop,” my daughter exclaimed as she entered the living room. “Please take my entire jewelry collection to Cash Converters or the Salvation Army.

After that, sell my new car, take my house key, and kick me out. Then disown me and never speak to me again. And don’t forget to write me out of your will and leave my share to my brother.”

But what she actually said was, “Dad, this is my new boyfriend.”